The Month of December.......By Denny C.

    

 The month of December, has been one of my favorite times of the year, for fun with friends  and family and some of the best memories have been born around this time. And yet sometimes it can be one of the hardest and emotional times as well.

    Sometimes those with brain injury can have small to a drastic change in their personality and what they like. So sometimes you think, “Oh Denny loves this dessert during Christmas, or I just know he will love this type of gift , he’s into those type of things.” Only to realize that they might not like eating the same way they did before, or that their tastes may have drastically changed or they’re no longer into that type of games, or clothes, or shows, or movies, or music. And the list could go on and on, even their favorite color might have changed, or the words they use might be different than the words they used before.

    And yet they look mainly the same, their voice might sound the same, depending on the injuries they might have had or being on a vent. But they are still going by the same name. And yet if only they could recover 100%. Now coming to you being one of those who has a severe brain injury, they too might want to make those around them happy by being 100% they might not ever be. I’m different and it took a while for my family to get use to the changes I have in me. Not major changes mind you, but differently changes.

    Now back to the point of this blog for today. Be happy! Yes be happy, it never does any good to waller in self-pity and be upset with yourself, if certain people don’t hang out with you like they did in the past. Or they talk to you less when you’re gathered together. Just move forward and strive to be all you are and can be. Being down never changes anything, but being up and positive about yourself each day, can help you overcome and experience, or see things you never dreamed you would ever do!!!

    And for those of you who are the ones who have had a friend or family member who survived a  severe brain injury and they seem to not be the same, deep down they are , they cannot help the changes in their thinking and likes and dislikes or even communication abilities they once had. So just grow to know the new person they might be and live them and help them where they need it and where they will let you do it.

    If you would ever like to reach out to me, you can follow me on Twitter at @Lifelucky or you can go to our YouTube Page!! You can Follow us on Facebook at the Family Factor email me  at thefamilyfactors@gmail.com And if you need me to ever come and speak to your church or group you may email me or call me at 405-265-8006. May you and your Family be blessed!!

Hmm...Second Chances , but What About Forgetting Those You Know and Love??

           For some who have experienced severe brain injury, it's like waking up as a toddler, or maybe even a one year old.  When I woke up from my induced coma after the brain injury incident,  it was like being a toddler.  I remembered 11!!all of those from my childhood, but not my wife back then , my children, or those who I knew as an adult, maybe a teenager!!  

           That has to be one of the hardest things to experience, especially if you are the spouse, children or a friend when they don't remember or even recognize them.  That was me!  

            And when I think about that in this day and time , I think it explains why my wife of those day separated from me and then filed for divorce.  And due to my thinking be different I believe that and not having daily relationship with them is why my children slowly faded away to the point the broke of my relationship with them.

            Let me tell you something you have to remember.  You ability to remember  your current relationships, your current age, where you've been living, what field of work your currently in, you might not remember at the current time when you are in rehabilitation!  But you know what?  That is currently fine!!  And for some of those who have had certain kinds of brain injuries you might never remember certain things or not remember anything  after a certain  part of your life or you might have to grow up again  completely with  a new life!  

          Just don't  blame yourself  !! It's just a type of life you might have to live.  But do not throw your new life away!  I didn't!!  As my blogs start getting posted  I pray I can be a help to anyone  in the world of brain injury!

     Why Life is a Pinball ...by Scooter C  May 3rd 2022

     Last weekend I went to a gathering of  Christian men, from all over the country.  The meeting is  called "Men's Advance". It is in  Stillwater, Oklahoma .  And normally it is every year  around the end of April.   

    Their theme this year was, "Life is a Pinball", and it really showed how each and every one of us are nothing than a pinball,  that constantly gets bumped by  the decisions we make, the actions of others,  and circumstances we face and go through in our lives.   

    This got me to thinking about  recovering form a severe brain injury.  How as you take each step  in recovery, there are going to be  many bumpers in the way of progress, that can shove and push you back ,several steps.  Only to have to start over again, and the frustration it causes.

    For anyone in life who is recovering from anything, I mean anything , there will always be bumpers as you, being like a pinball, roll though this life.  Say you have ,for a long time, been  clean from drugs abuse .  Whether it be  drugs, legal or illegal, alcohol,  pornography, overeating, gambling, spending beyond your monthly income , or a person who constantly is lying to others, on the phone  or even in Facebook, twitter etc.   You've worked hard to beat what ever it is  or like me you  have been recovering from a severe injury to your brain or  body, or heart , only leading you to sometimes want to throw in the towel and quit, DON'T!!

    Your life is worth it!! Don't quit, maybe stop, shut off everything  around you, and breath  and pray to the Father in heaven.   He will hear you. He knows what your going through and though Him you can always make it, but there is one important  statement you must not ever forget.  IN HIS TIME!  I told myself that I wanted my life to go back to normal NOW, right at THIS TIME!!  And of course it didn't and it doesn't .  Real life is not  like that.  However as the song says ," In His time , in His time . He makes all things beautiful in His time. Lord please show me every day, as Your teaching me Your way. That You do just what You say, in Your time."  

    If I were to look at a the Fathers thoughts on this life inside a pinball machine, where I'm the pinball in play   the scripture  I would use , in the KJV , would be Psalms 130:5, "I wait on the Lord, my soul doth wait, and in His word do I hope." 

    Now let me close with this last thought, What is your scripture?  What is your thought about your life in this maze of pinball?  If I can ever be of a help please contact me  !  

    So don't give up , grow in your faith, for out of it,  will you grow in  your patience. Overcoming what ever  bumper  you come up against and let the Lord and His word correct  your  paths  toward  peace , rest and happiness.

  

Branson is not a Misery in Missouri ! Really its not!

  Well  my wife  Cyndi and I had a wonderful weekend together at Branson. We went and saw Sight and Sounds "Jesus" which is a must see!!  It was a great musical  of the life of Jesus from birth to his death  and  resurrection on the earth.  

    We saw another musical  and story  about a Baptist  Church  in the 30's . great southern gospel music !!  And while there was a lot of  comedy , in my opinion the  funniest character was  played by  a young lady  who  was more funny  , as my wife said then most male comedians!!  

     Now to the purpose of this post, happiness.  What is happiness?    You know 20 years ago  this Friday  is the 20th anniversary  of the  car wreck that  told me that nope I'm not superman  and  nope my head is not made of steel.   20 years ago my ex-wife was told that I wasn't expected to live, and if I lived I would be nothing more than a 1 year old, due to the  severe brain injury. 

      Happiness was not waking up in T.I.R.R.  after being  transferred 3 weeks earlier from Herman hospital  where the brain surgery took place  and  where I was put in  a induced coma for  over 30 days then  transferred  to T.I.R.R.  

     Happiness is not  meeting someone only to forget who they are with in 10 minutes, only to forget ,and then  meet them again 10 minutes later and ask who they are.  I was literally the  30 second memory dude off of the movie 50 1st dates!!

    Happiness is not  knowing who your ex-wife is when she is still your wife  and you don't recognize them and your dad keeps saying to you she's your girlfriend, due to the  issue with my brain. 

     Happiness is not  know simple words of the English language and the word you choose might mean the same thing but it is not what you would normally use in your day to day language.

     Happiness is not being able to keep  mouth shut, due to a non barrier issue,  when you think about what  to say  and it can be something really dumb or  that the other party didn't need to know.    For when it happens, it can cause hurt feelings and anger in the other people you are speaking  to, and can cause an escalation  to the events you are talking about.     

     Happiness is not being shunned and put down by the spouse you gave your life to  and  to be accused of things you would never do, to have to spend a lot of money to prove your innocence only to never be told ,"sorry" form them.

     Happiness is  not  being told you can never  do the same work that you loved doing for 15 years  due to the lies and the so called sin you were guilty of that you committed in private, that your repented of and  confessed in private prayer.

     Happiness is not  to see your children taken across state lines from you while your still recovering at T.I.R.R and see you own parents  hurt by what the other party is doing to you,  their chu ,while you are still recovering from a major injury.

     Now I could go on and on with what happiness is not , but why would I ?  I am nothing but blood and bone and  soul.  And happiness is that  Jesus  of Nazareth, being the son of God  and fashioned as a man , became that living sacrifice for the sins of us all!! 

     I'm nothing  but Jesus helped me realize that I'm  actually something!  So happiness is the blessings of having 20 years of recovery and growth and experience in things I might not have ever experienced if it had not been for that wreck 20 years ago!!

    What good is a life ,if all I do is sit and  have my heart feasting on anger and sadness for the hurt, the lies, and the issues that came about due to my own foolish choices, decisions, and actions.

       Your not perfect  and if you are a saved  Christian , then do not let  the  life of your past or present ,with the mistakes you have made or are currently making,  tear you up and not  press forward in the steps of life  of happiness !!!  For if you  do it, will keep you bitter toward yourself and others!!   Then those who  were out to hurt you, and defeat you, will win!!                 

      

       

The Visit I Made To Noah's Ark Encounter

     Well hello again fellow bloggers! 

     My wife and I just saw this wonderful exhibit on  a great trip.  And while we went to six different states, we enjoyed staying in Florence, Kentucky and visiting both the "Creation Musem" in Petersburg, Kentucky  and the "Ark Encounter" at Williamstown, Kentucky.  

    

    In this blog, I want to only discuss the  Ark Encounter  visit.  It was one of the most fulfilling experience.  Fulfilling because I had heard the story, of Noah and the Ark starting when I was a toddler. Then  I read it in the bible, and then when I grew older, I started studying the actual points that the Heavenly Father was making through out the events during the days of Noah, written by Moses in Genesis 6:1-9:17

     The 55 to 75 years it took Noah to build the Ark and the time it took by those of today , amazes me why in the bible it took Noah and his family that long to  build the ark.  For all that God order Noah build and the animals that God ordered to put in there shows why it was built exactly the way it needed to be built.  In all the  countries of old, they too have their own stories of a flood but as one of the  displays at the ark encounter showed they would have all failed except the one in the Bible, based on the schematics of each vessel described.

    They had numerous exhibits trying to show  every possible needs everyone and every animal would need on the ark those 150 days, even their  means of fresh water to waste management while on the ship.

    Now I would love to get to one of the most important  parts of the exhibit that  for the 1st time  made the best sense in showing why the earth is not  billions of years old, and where the dinosaurs went and how it combats those scientists and those who do not believe in the 6 days creation study found in the book of Genisis!!! 

    Dr. Ken Ham  and all the staff at that exhibit will lay it out before your eyes one point at a time.   But the main point they make at both the Creation Museum and the Ark Creation is as the story says God judged the world , full of sin then and he saved Noah , his wife, and three sons and their wives of which the  whole world of humans would come from.  And as a promise that the world would never be flooded like that again, God,the Father, made a covenant with Noah by the rainbow being a constant sign that this wouldbe the visual reminder of that promise in the sky!   

    Thus this leads to the last point of the blog, how then will God judge all men since it will not be by flood?  In the Bible, in the book of 1 Thess. 4:16-17, 2 Thess. 1:7-10.  These versus say that the world will be destroyed and judged by fire.  But one of the best passages to look at is 2 Peter 3:3-18, these passages clearly show that the last way the hearts of mankind will be in those last days! So let me ask you one quick question , how is your heart?  Do you have faith in Jesus the Christ and the grace that has been shown to all who will believe he is the Christ , the Son and lamb of God who  was crucified  on the cross for each of us and our sins?  

        Dear reader only you can make the decision as to where your future will be! You have  so far, so please look into yourself and see where the future of your heart and life is headed.  I recommend you go online to  arkencounter.com to find out more on what I shared with you or go to it in person!!!  

    There will be more posts from me now, and I'll explain my life and how I rose from having severe brain injury and how my life has had many 180s in its direction but  how it is stable and moving forward !! If you are a brain injury survivor or know on who is  and have questions or would like me to come and speak to a group about how life can be hard walk that leads to  a wonderful ending  then please contact me !   Thanks for reading.

When the Truth and False Comes Out....By Denny C.

            Many times when a person has had a severe brain injury, they can have many changes in their future.  Sometimes it’s their work life, their marriage life, their financial life, and their spiritual life.  And all of the uncertainty, the possible hurt, and major life changes can cause them to wonder, “Why have lived in the 1^st place?”   You see, this was me.   Notice I say it “was” me!     

            When I got released form T.I.R.R. in patient and then started out patient, my married life was the 1^st one that went on the brink.  My former wife is disabled and I believe to this day, that she thought if I wasn’t all there, and the possibility that I would never recover, that she would be stuck holding the bag and wouldn’t be able to make it.  I have never had any hard feelings over that possible fear and thinking she might have had!

            That could have happened to anyone, but there are other issues that came up which I will not go into, on this post.  But what did happen, ruined my work life that can never be undone.  Let me just say that when I lived, it set a path for me and those related to me, that has even swayed my children in a way toward things that are untrue.

            There were from those days many false rumors that went out about my private life, that were proven to be false from every way possible, but we live in a  world where people love to gossip , and they love to gossip about stories that were told by their spouses, children, friends, and even preachers!

            And unfortunately those, who I loved dearly, who really stabbed me in the heart with their words, judgments, and actions.  I fully believe in the verse where it is said, “Judge not, that you be not judged!”  And if the religion they follow is to put everyone, except themselves, on the must be perfect, on the level with the Lord, they have missed the point of the grace of God entirely!

            Let me say this one time only, there has been and will never be any perfect person that has walked the face of this earth, except one, Jesus the Christ, the son of God!  I got so tired of listening to the gossip stories that went on between certain preachers, and certain members of the church of Christ!   

            My grandma Holloway always told me, “If you don’t have something positive to say, then don’t say it!”  Now I must admit, when I was young, I never followed her advice on that subject. I have been just as guilty of talking about a person and the mistakes they made in a way that I have never made any mistakes!  You see my friend that is a sin!  And the Lord’s said it best when He said, “To him who is without sin, cast the first stone.”  This he said to an adulteress who was going to be stoned by the holy that thou group of that day. That verse has hung in my head for decades!   Turn on the news, listen to the men and the ladies in their conversation outside of worship, work, school, or with the family when they are together.  How many times do we or others around us, repeat what we have been told or seen on the television, or heard on the radio, or something through media, or something told to us by a person?

             Well I think I’ll get off my soap box now!  But again I have spoken to many souls who have had major physical life stories and for some of them, they are even worse than mine!  And let me leave you with the following question.  If you never knew them or heard them say it, or saw them do it, how do you now it’s true?  Only the Father in heaven can see all and know all, as to the truth that is in the heart of every one of us and what is buried deeply in our thoughts and hearts! 

Word Choice and Private Thoughts Are Always Interesting! By Denny C

One of the issues I had in the beginning of my recovery was the words I would choose when speaking to someone.   Now why that was, I just don’t know.  Let me give you an example.  Let’s say I needed to go to the bathroom to relive myself.  If I was speaking to someone I might say, “O, I need to pee in the toilet!”  Instead of,” Excuse me, I need to use the restroom.”     

Now my biggest issue was, I have what is called, no mental barriers.  A barrier in our brain is the ability to stop yourself from saying something you are thinking of privately and not blurt it out both good or bad.  For example if you don’t like something someone is wearing or something you’re eating, that was home made at someone house, and you just blurt out what you’re thinking.   Now not only have you embarrassed yourself, but also you are hurting the other person with those words. Now if they realize you have that issue, it makes it even harder for them to deal with it!  Why you ask?  One, you spoke to them what you really thought of the situation.  Two, they realize you don’t have the ability to keep your true thoughts inside.  Third, they might still have to live with the negative opinion from someone they love and care about who just spoke up about how their clothes looked or their food tasted.

In the beginning the person with this issue might not realize what they are saying is wrong to say!  I know that I didn’t.  I just said whatever I was thinking about, anything about anybody, good or bad.  I would speak out about it, whether it was right or wrong to speak out about it, out loud!  Eighteen years later, it really bothers me about how bad it was for me back then!  Moreover, even though I fully understand why it was happening, I’m still very embarrassed.

I could not keep it to myself, nor could I tell a lie!  You would think that having a person around you, who could not lie, even if they wanted to, was marvelous!  However, in this culture everyone is into the little white lies, I couldn’t!  Over time due to losing the type of work I loved doing, do to certain issues in my private life, I would fool myself into believing I was someone else, and able to be  fool others I was this new person!  Those thoughts is what I used to give myself a better opinion of myself, after crying out to the Lord asking why was I not protected from those life events!!

I really hate to confess to you in writing, but I was hurt, mad, and upset with the Lord!  Boy am I a stupid man!  If anything the love of the Lord is why He let me live!  He let me live to not only look at myself and the ugly , horrible hurt that I had gone through in my life, but that by His grace He helped and is helping me rebuild both my physical and spiritual life.

Since that had happened, I was like Peter who denied the Lord 3 times, except I was denying the Lord in many ways!  However, let me say this, there is no soul, no human on earth that is or was perfect, except Jesus the Christ!  Before my brain injury, I constantly passed judgement on many people, issues, and works of others.  Yet the Lord stated, Judge not that you ne not judged!  “John 7:1 KJV